So close, yet so far

It's that time of year, where everybody's tired and it sorta feels like school should be finished, but the end is not quite here yet. Hang in there! I feel your pain!

Meanwhile, I decided to go ahead and do my reflections now because I've learned so much and I am so excited about finishing strong and starting off fresh next September.

As most of you know, I resigned from my teaching position in 2016. I took a whole year off, while still working in a school setting as a substitute, a one-on-one aide, an after-school program teacher, and a summer school teacher. I returned to the classroom in a private school setting this past school year. Many things differ from public to private but one thing remains: kids will be kids.

I've had a lot of challenges this year including the fact that for the majority of the school year, I was pregnant. Let me tell you - it took nothing less than the supernatural strength of God for me to have enough energy to still do the strenuous job of a teacher while a whole human was growing inside of me. I've had great, good, bad, and really bad days. Many times, the bad and really bad days seemed to overshadow the good and great ones. But I'm often challenged by my husband to record my feelings after the really good days so that when bad days come, I can listen to it and remind myself that it's not all bad and that I can handle it. Well, the words on my bulletin board definitely came to life last week:

don't mind the missing flowers: they're coming in May

A few days last week were such a struggle. I woke up early one day last week stressed, thinking about how the day might go. I kept thinking, "I'm going to have to go in and be mean and lecture and let them know I mean business and I'll be ready to kick someone out if I have to". That alone had me even more restless because I knew it was so far from my character and I didn't know if it would fly. But everything shifted when I finally woke up later.

That morning I read the Bible, I prayed in the car and listened to motivational videos, and when I got to school I prayed the whole time walking to my classroom and asked for God's presence in the school, in the halls, in the classroom, and in my room specifically. I prayed for the students and everyone coming that day. When I tell you, the day was a complete turn around from the previous day's mayhem and I was so grateful to God.

When I got home all I could say was "weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning". The day was a good day, but even when there's a bad day, I can't let it control my emotions so much that I start belittling myself and questioning my purpose at my job. God allowed me to be there so that means I have what it takes to stay.

As the school year comes to a close, I am learning one other huge principle.

The work of an educator never stops!! Even in the summer. Yes it's a break, but there's still work going on...

That includes pd over the summer, reflections and planning, and continuous PRAYING!

There's this hilarious meme going around letting parents know that in a few more weeks, the kids will be all there's. But here's the thing...

Being at home over the summer may not necessarily be a good thing for some of our students. Summers off may mean insufficient meals, forgetting everything they've learned, more opportunities to get into trouble and a plethora of other challenges.

Sometimes school is the only "stable" place where students are "covered" or "loved". Over the summer let us as educators commit to growth and development, but also continuing to pray that God covers all students and brings them back to us safely next school year.