Self-Reflection Sundays: Love and Pandemic

Reflecting and realizing that showing love to family and friends is hard far away. Eventually, you miss having the opportunity to see people in person. Well that's kind of hard right now...or is it?

Does anybody else feel like Covid has mysteriously vanished? (I know it really didn't. People are still very much getting infected). It just seems like a lot of the world is back to the way things were and I wonder if I missed the memo.

My family and I have been home except for a few trips for necessities. We have a 2 year old and I am 35 weeks pregnant and we've done our best to take every precaution to make sure we are safe, yet somehow I feel like people are looking at us like we're neurotic psychopaths who are just trying to keep everybody out. People probably aren't really looking at us this way, but it just seems like everything has gone back to normal everywhere except in my house and I feel weird about it. Sometimes I wonder if I'm alone. It hurts, literally hurts when we don't have people over at the house. It hurts that I don't get to see my family or friends. I wonder if people truly understand why or if they think I'm being a mean, introverted ogre. I don't feel bad for trying to stay safe, but I do feel bad when I internalize how I think others think.

So many people are hanging out, so many people aren't wearing masks. Safety seems like it died down and it makes me wonder if I'm crazy for not moving in the same direction. Now I'm judging no one; its their business. I can only control what I do. But I feel weird that there's a lot that I still will not do. Are people thinking I'm doing the most? How long do I have to live this way? When will I feel comfortable enough to say yes to company or yes to engagements?  I wonder if I should let up and go ahead and start living again like this virus is gone.

Ahhhhh, am I alone? Does anyone else feel like this? I don't want to be close to people but I miss people and I don't want anyone to feel like love is lost just because we're taking preventative measures. If I'm not alone, then let me encourage you. You have to do what you have to do, even if it means looking irrational. Others' comfort level may not be where your comfort level is, but that is okay. Love yourself and do what's best for you. There are many ways to love others if you're not ready for in-person gatherings.